Beyond Insight

The following was sent to me by Jack at The Lazarus House. I think my readers will enjoy.

JULY 7 – BUILDING BLOCK 19 – SELF-KNOWLEDGE RELAPSE PREVENTION SERIES IS SELF-KNOWLEDGE THE ANSWER TO ADDICTION? “A certain American business man had ability, good sense, and high character . For years he had floundered from one sanitarium to another. (They didn’t have treatment centers in those days.) He had consulted the best know American psychiatrists; yet could not stop drinking. Then he had gone to Europe, placing himself in the care to the celebrated physician (the psychiatrist Dr. Carl Jung.) He finished his experience with unusual confidence. His physical and mental condition were unusually good. Above all, he believed he had acquired such a profound knowledge of the inner working of his mind and its hidden springs that relapse was unthinkable. Nevertheless, he was drunk in a short time. More baffling still, he could give himself no satisfactory explanation for his fall.” (A.A. Page 26)
“Those of us who suffer from addiction, with hardly an exception, will be absolutely unable to stop drinking or using drugs on the basis of self-knowledge. This is a point we wish to EMPHAIZE and RE-EMPHASIZE, to smash home upon the person reading this information, as it has been revealed to us out of bitter experience.” (A.A. Page 39)
JULY 10– BUILDING BLOCK 22 – THE SOLUTION.RELAPSE PREVENTION SERIES. (Attachment may be easier to read.)What “wisdom” did the original members of A.A. pass on to us regarding this matter? “There was nothing else for us to do but to “pick up” the simple kit of “spiritual tools” laid at our feet.” (A.A. Page 25)Some alcoholics and drugs addicts may think they can do without spiritual help. Let us tell you about a conversation one of our members had with his renowned psychiatrist, Dr. Carl Jung. He had spent six months under Dr. Jung’s care and believed the “self-knowledge” he acquired was the answer to his problem; that he would never pick up a drink again, but he relapsed. Upon meeting with Dr. Jung, the doctor said: "You have the mind of a chronic alcoholic. I have never seen one single case recover, where that state of mind existed to the extent that it does in you." Our friend felt as though the gates of hell had closed on him with a clang. He said to the doctor, "Is there no exception?" "Yes," replied the doctor, "there is. Exceptions to cases such as yours have been occurring since early times. Here and there, once in a while, alcoholics and drug addicts have had what are called vital spiritual experiences. To me these occurrences are phenomena. They appear to be in the nature of:1. Huge emotional displacements and rearrangements. (Fear to courage, resentments to forgiveness.)2. Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men and women are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begins to dominate them. In fact, I have been trying to produce some such emotional rearrangements within you. With many individuals the methods which I employ are successful, but I have never been successful with an alcoholic of your description." Upon hearing this, our friend was somewhat relieved, for he reflected that, after all, he was a good church member. This hope, however, was destroyed by the doctor's telling him that while his religious convictions were very good, in his case they did not spell the necessary vital spiritual experience. Here was the terrible dilemma in which our friend found himself when he had the extraordinary spiritual experience, which as we have already told you, made him a free man. We, in our turn, sought the same escape with all the desperation of drowning men. What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, "a design for living" that really works. The distinguished American psychologist, William James, in his book ‘Varieties of Religious Experience,’ indicates a multitude of ways in which men and women have discovered God. We have no desire to convince anyone that there is only one way by which faith can be acquired. If what we have learned and felt and seen means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever our race, creed, or color are the children of a living Creator with whom we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms as soon as we are willing and honest enough to try. (A.A. Page 27-8)“Every few days, Dr. Silkworth “suggests” our approach to one of his patients. Understanding our work, he can do this with an eye to selecting those who are willing and able to recover – on a spiritual basis.” (A.A. Page 162)Are we “suggesting” the same solution today, or have “meetings” become the “God” who keeps us clean and sober? Meeting makers make it. Has the “message” “We decided to go to any lengths to FIND a spiritual experience been replaced with “We decided to go to any lengths to AVOID picking up a drink or drug.” What do you think? Namaste, (The light in me honors the light in you.)Jack

Thanks Jack

Sample Chapter of: Coaching Steps (All Twelve of Them)

  Step 1 – We admitted that we were powerless…that our lives had become unmanageable.

Admitting powerlessness can be one of the most daunting, yet ironically, empowering achievements. When we are stuck in the rut of (falsely) thinking that we have power to control events and attitudes, we are doomed to be let down. This inevitable let down in the people, places, things we put our trust in causes life to become frustrating and unmanageable. Once we let go of the need to have power and to be powerful, life becomes simple, manageable, and much more livable.

I went with several friends to do some surfing in the Mediterranean. The sky was clear, the water was warm, and the waves were just the right size. It couldn’t have been a better day for surfing. Not far from our surfing spot was an old shipwreck. The ship must have sunk at least 30 years previously and was a rusty, jagged mess. Having surfed that spot several times previously we knew to stay as far away as possible from that disaster waiting to happen. However, there was a friend of ours who had joined us for the first time and was unaware of the shipwreck. We began to hear screaming. It was our friend yelling to us for help. He was about fifteen feet from the wreck and the next wave, which was fast approaching, was about to throw him against the sharp rust edges of the wreck. The strongest swimmer in our group yelled at him to swim as hard as he could right towards the wreck. Logic would have dictated that he should have swum away from the wreck to save his life. Our friend listened to the advice given to him and swam as hard as he could directly towards the shipwreck. The wave came and carried him several feet beyond the rusty crags. If he had swum against the current, the wave would have carried him to a bitter fate. Having admitted powerlessness of his situation, this friend of mine was able to accept the advice of others—advice that saved his life.

When I began my private life coaching practice the first thing I did after getting my first client was to hire a supervisor. My supervisors name is David and he lives in California on the Pacific Coast. You might ask your self, if I am worth my salt as a life coach then what do I need a supervisor for. The answer is this, I am human and I make mistakes just like the rest of us. There are times when my best judgment is compromised by my own agenda, hopes, and aspirations for my clients, during those times, I am powerless and my coaching practice becomes unmanageable. It is for this reason that I hired a supervisor. Why is it that when lost, us men will drive around in circles, waste gas, and be late for our appointments rather than pull into a gas station and ask for directions? If it is because we have too much pride to admit being powerless, that is foolishness. Such pride hampers our efficiency and wastes our precious time, money, and peace of mind, and renders our lives unmanageable. I once heard of a mother who instead of asking her son what he had learned that day in school, would ask him what questions he asked the teacher that day. Learning requires being inquisitive, asking questions, and being open and receptive to answers. Recovery coaching requires being inquisitive, asking questions, and being open and receptive to answers. If we are too embarrassed to ask for help then we are too embarrassed for recovery. Next time we are in a situation, which is difficult or unclear to us, we should be sensible enough to put our embarrassment on hold and ask for help!!!

Every now-and-then each of us has the experience of being under the weather, fluish, feverish, and stuck in bed for a few days. When that happens we are reminded of how vulnerable we are; of how unmanageable our lives are; yet I can’t think of anybody who refuses to acknowledge the reality of lying in bed feeling powerless. It is the very feeling of disempowerment when sick in bed that motivates people to take the action of taking Aspirin or visiting the doctor for a throat culture. When somebody has gangrene, if the condition is not treated immediately, the condition can spread to the rest of the body, putting the person’s life in jeopardy. If not caught in time the foot needs to be amputated. An admission of being powerless to control the condition as is, motivates the person to seek help. Although a person may loose his leg, he will most likely not loose his life. Admission of being powerless and unable to self-manage our lives humbles us, bringing us to accept outside help to manage our lives.

There were two Air force Pilots flying over the sea; one of the jets flipped over (at extremely high speeds fighter jets sometimes flip over). In this case, the pilot whose plane flipped over was unable to distinguish the blue water from the blue sky. His instruments showed that he was right side up and very close to the water (what was down appeared up and what was up appeared down). His partner, in the neighboring plane, corrected him and implored him to pull his plane down hard. The pilot found it difficult to disregard not only his own view, but also the readings of his instruments. Air traffic control confirmed that he was upside down and about to crash into the sea, and pleaded with him to pull his plane “down.” The pilot, admitting that he his own view of reality was rendering him powerless on his own, and that his life had become unmanageable on his own, took a deep breath and pulled the plane steeply “down.” If the pilot had held onto his own view of reality he would have died in an unnecessary plane crash.

Although on our own, we are certainly powerless; and on our own, our lives are unmanageable, we do have the power to admit our powerlessness and the unmanageability of our life circumstances. We are then able to seek guidance and support, then and only then are we able to align ourselves with true power—the power of a support network and the power of our Highest Power.

In what ways are you powerless? In what ways has your life become unmanageable? What is the process you must go through in order to admit that you are powerless…that your life has become unmanageable? How do you feel now that you have humbled yourself by making the admission of powerlessness and unmanageability? What will you do to honor yourself for having completed you First Step?